If Breitling Was a Movie, What Would the Line Be?

Scott · **Posted:** Fri Jul 22, 2011 8:15 am

Let's try Sci-Fi and Metaphorical:

Jeff Goldblum in The Fly, and also describing what must have happened to Breitling's design team computers and 3D modeler:

The computer... got confused - there weren't supposed to be two separate genetic patterns - and it decided to... uhh... splice us together.

... to which we reply, from the original movie, "Help meeee"

Yep, it's Friday.

guyc · **Posted:** Fri Jul 22, 2011 12:02 pm

Just when I thought you couldn't possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!

RJRJRJ · **Posted:** Fri Jul 22, 2011 7:56 pm

"It's not a tumor."
-Kindergarten Cop

Novacastrian · **Posted:** Fri Jul 22, 2011 8:54 pm

Breitling Exec: You want answers?
Breitling Fan: I think I'm entitled to them.
BE: You want answers?
BF: I want the truth!
BE: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has bezels. And those bezels have to be cheap and mass produceable. Who's gonna make them? You Roffensian? You, Sharkman? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You weep for rider tabs and Steelfish and you curse the 2011 lineup. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that rubber bezels, while tragic, probably saved money. And orange limited editions, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, build market share...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me making rubber bezels. You need me making rubber bezels.

We use words like rattrapante, tourbillion, navitimer...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the chronometers I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide them! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a loupe and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: You're goddamn right I did!!

RXPete · **Posted:** Fri Jul 22, 2011 9:06 pm

Novacastrian wrote:

Breitling Exec: You want answers?
Breitling Fan: I think I'm entitled to them.
BE: You want answers?
BF: I want the truth!
BE: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has bezels. And those bezels have to be cheap and mass produceable. Who's gonna make them? You Roffensian? You, Sharkman? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You weep for rider tabs and Steelfish and you curse the 2011 lineup. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that rubber bezels, while tragic, probably saved money. And orange limited editions, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, save market share...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me making rubber bezels. You need me making rubber bezels.

We use words like rattrapante, tourbillion, navitimer...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the chronometers I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide them! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a loupe and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: You're goddamn right I did!!

It's better than the original!!

H2F · **Posted:** Fri Jul 22, 2011 11:42 pm

roman4405 · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:53 am

I think we've found a winner

Sent from my Droid using Tapatalk

mfserge · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 3:07 am

Novacastrian wrote:

Breitling Exec: You want answers?
Breitling Fan: I think I'm entitled to them.
BE: You want answers?
BF: I want the truth!
BE: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has bezels. And those bezels have to be cheap and mass produceable. Who's gonna make them? You Roffensian? You, Sharkman? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You weep for rider tabs and Steelfish and you curse the 2011 lineup. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that rubber bezels, while tragic, probably saved money. And orange limited editions, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, build market share...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me making rubber bezels. You need me making rubber bezels.

We use words like rattrapante, tourbillion, navitimer...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the chronometers I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide them! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a loupe and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: You're goddamn right I did!!

Well it isn't a 'one liner' but that's the funniest thing I have read in a long time. VERY WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Driver8 · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 4:04 am

mfserge wrote:

Novacastrian wrote:

Breitling Exec: You want answers?
Breitling Fan: I think I'm entitled to them.
BE: You want answers?
BF: I want the truth!
BE: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has bezels. And those bezels have to be cheap and mass produceable. Who's gonna make them? You Roffensian? You, Sharkman? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You weep for rider tabs and Steelfish and you curse the 2011 lineup. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that rubber bezels, while tragic, probably saved money. And orange limited editions, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, build market share...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me making rubber bezels. You need me making rubber bezels.

We use words like rattrapante, tourbillion, navitimer...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the chronometers I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide them! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a loupe and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: You're goddamn right I did!!

Well it isn't a 'one liner' but that's the funniest thing I have read in a long time. VERY WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not quite a genuine quote :wink:

, but an awesome job. If I was Sharkman, I'd have found the winner! :thumbsup:

Alan M · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 4:56 am

Novacastrian wrote:

Breitling Exec: You want answers?
Breitling Fan: I think I'm entitled to them.
BE: You want answers?
BF: I want the truth!
BE: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has bezels. And those bezels have to be cheap and mass produceable. Who's gonna make them? You Roffensian? You, Sharkman? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You weep for rider tabs and Steelfish and you curse the 2011 lineup. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that rubber bezels, while tragic, probably saved money. And orange limited editions, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, build market share...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me making rubber bezels. You need me making rubber bezels.

We use words like rattrapante, tourbillion, navitimer...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the chronometers I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide them! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a loupe and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: You're goddamn right I did!!

Stunner!

Sent from my sock draw

john123 · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 4:59 am

Novacastrian wrote:

Breitling Exec: You want answers?
Breitling Fan: I think I'm entitled to them.
BE: You want answers?
BF: I want the truth!
BE: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has bezels. And those bezels have to be cheap and mass produceable. Who's gonna make them? You Roffensian? You, Sharkman? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom.

You weep for rider tabs and Steelfish and you curse the 2011 lineup. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that rubber bezels, while tragic, probably saved money. And orange limited editions, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, build market share...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me making rubber bezels. You need me making rubber bezels.

We use words like rattrapante, tourbillion, navitimer...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the chronometers I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide them! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a loupe and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
BF: Did you order the rubber bezels?
BE: You're goddamn right I did!!

One of my favorite movies of all time. That one deserves a standing "O"...very well done, and as far as I am concerned you should win. :bow:

sharkman · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 5:43 am

Hmmmm. That will be hard to top, but it will be up to the forum to choose next week. Why didn't I think of that one on the Xezo thread? :wink:

Damn well done! Ten-Hut! There's an officer on the deck.

sharkman · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 5:45 am

H2F wrote:

:uplaugh:

Oh, NOW you get it. :uplaugh:

H2F · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 10:08 am

sharkman wrote:

H2F wrote:

Oh, NOW you get it. :uplaugh:

(NOT sayin nuttin in this thread... :lol:

)

JacksonStone · **Posted:** Sat Jul 23, 2011 11:37 am

sharkman wrote:

Hmmmm. That will be hard to top, but it will be up to the forum to choose next week. Why didn't I think of that one on the Xezo thread? :wink:

If Novacastrian never read the Xezo thread, then his quote is a remarkable achievement in its own right. Considering I read the thread for the first time just a few days ago, the impact of the current iteration is somewhat blunted due to redundancy. (And really, how can you top a line like, "I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the rainbow of the very spectrum that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it"?)

I keep racking my brain to come up with a quote worthy of posting, but I still can't think of one that sums up my feelings better than the Monty Python reference that opened this thread. Breitling's strategically aimed flatulence can be felt worldwide by the disillusioned faithful.

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